Maintenance Spanking

Maintenance Spanking

Maintenance Spanking - is used as a time based continuing tool within a process to maintain focus, revisit and/or re-establish effect & relationship goals.... administered during or as part of the process. 

Vera admit.’ Maintenance with my husband is a little different, in fact I love it.....which makes me think perhaps it is not traditional type maintenance....

It is usually gentle and sort of intimate, but not sexual necessarily, just a time for him to cuddle me, and get me to reaffirm my commitment to his authority. There is spanking involved but not hard. I love the closeness of it.

I guess it is different everywhere, though, like all of this thing we do...

Maintenance Spankings; Why Do It?

Lexi told,’ Maintenance spankings are a way to keep the relationship fresh, revive the roles on a regular basis and to not let life away from the dynamic interfere with what your relationship goals are. A maintenance spanking can be anything from a scheduled night of the week where a short and sweet spanking takes place, to a more drawn out session of power and control. Either way, their purpose is to maintain the dynamic.’

People who  have outside jobs, to maintain  24/7  BDSM lifestyle afresh , could use maintenance spankings to keep the D/s alive when you feel it may fade into bills, running the kids to sports practice and work. A maintenance spanking works something like a scheduled meeting. On whatever day you have set for your maintenance spanking you meet, talk about your week in terms of your role and confess any backsliding you are aware of. These things are taken into account with how the spanking will play out because the point is to keep you focused on your submission. Be honest with your Master. Even if you aren't masochist you can benefit from these spankings.

The spanking is dictated by the Dominant to be whatever they want it to be. It could be sensual, it could be rough. It may or may not end with sex. These are variables that make each relationship unique. I personally prefer spankings that end in orgasms for both of us, but that may not be what works for you.

The important part of a maintenance spanking is that it's scheduled and you do not reschedule. This is for the health of your relationship dynamic. Having something to look forward to each week or so is revitalizing and can help keep you focused where you need to be during difficult times. It can also bring more intimacy into your life. These moments are about just the family in BDSM lifestyle do connect intimatly. The power of touch, even in a swat is well worth it.

Also using maintenance spankings can and do decrease the need for punishment spankings. When you receive maintenance spankings then it is more likely that your behaviour and attitude will stay positive and your Dom will be less likely to be disobedient. Once you are obedient more often than maintenance spankings can and should be reduced.

Thanks Giving is the end step of Maintenance spanking as you are benefiting from it. While Thanksgiving , you should reconcile by  corner time and realize what for you are corrected, I thought it would be fitting to write about gratitude, and how to express your gratitude to the one you serve. Being thankful can take on many forms, and each time we feel that sensation of gratitude well up we can use a different display of appreciation. For example, thanking your Dominant for giving you an orgasm will be treated differently than if you are grateful that hold the power in your life. Orgasm gratitude is usually expressed immediately after a while you may take a while to express your feelings for the later.

Take a moment and come up with some things you are grateful in your life that you may not have had before you were in a relationship with your Dominant. Sure you can say thank you. That's standard. I really hope you take every opportunity to say thank you. The most important are  the development and  overall happiness in the relationship.

As a Sub, we need to show our appreciation to our Masters  by expressing our self by our own to make it honest and full of your service.

It can be any as below:-

Offer

The first idea is to offer a service that you don't normally do. It can be anything. Give a massage, bathe their feet, sexual service that you don't pine after (for me that's analingus). Be a foot stool, be their tax preparer. Anything that would just make their day and surprises them would fit the bill. Just remember to make it a part of yourself. Offering to pay for them to attend a salon is not the same thing, as offering yourself for a day of pampering.

Create

This idea isn't about making something but setting a mood. If you know your Dominant is going to coming home from a stressful day, it would be as simple as soft lights and maybe candles to help them relax and shed the outside world. Making sure the home is picked up and inviting can bring a lot of emotion attached to it. It not only shows that you care for the household possessions but also how it makes people feel when they enter.

You can also create an atmosphere appropriate for whatever may be planned. If play is on the menu, then neatly prepare your play space. If dinner is the order of the day, setting the table as if you are in a fine restaurant can show your appreciation for a number of things.

Do

Take an idea from online for a ritual that you don't do. Perhaps it can be kneeling and then lower your face cheek to cheek to the floor in submission or kneeling when you bring their drink. Adding that bit of focused attention is a pleasant surprise to a Dominant and shows them that you care for how you present your submission. There is any number of things you can do in this vein. From a specific way you adopt to disrobe, to how you reply to requests in a set format. It's not just up to the Dominant to add ritual and intensity to the relationship. Volunteering these simple steps will tell them that you thank them for the opportunity to serve them.

Make

Sure it's quite easy to go to the store and purchase something for them, but when was the last time you made something for them? You don't have to learn anything or have specific skills. Make a special dinner or dessert, write a card or poem, and put together a photo album or mosaic. Something homemade has more meaning than a purchased item.

Rededicate

Ultimately, this should only be done if you are really ready to deepen your relationship or there has been a lapse in the dynamic that you wish to try to repair. Again, the ritual that this involves can be simple to elaborate so let your mind develop what would work for you. Even just setting aside time to talk about how you wish to submit and offering that over voluntarily expresses how you love the relationship and what they do for you. Again, you don't have to wait for the Dominant to tell you to create a ritual or process for doing something. I've gained so many rituals just by starting it and having him say he really likes it.

If you have gotten lazy in your rules, start really digging in and doing them before you get in trouble. Don't let their distraction sway you. You want to serve, that's why you are in this relationship so serve. Your submission just might deepen their Dominance and the rededication can you an exchange, just as it should be.

Lastly, remember to say thank you when you do these things. Make it about them. We take too much for granted anymore. Don't let your relationship become one of those things. Relationships build because we work at them, show how much you appreciate everything they do and you will also reap the rewards.

I want the youngest Mom Jaime(28) to tell her experience of maintenance spankings. She is a young lady and step mom of Stafany who is very near to age and in their household like many BDSM is a 24 x 7 lifestyle where privacy is not the privilege.

A few years ago, since I submit to Sir Thomas,we had developed a system of maintenance spankings… every Wednesday at 7pm I was spanked.

Jaime look and her daughter and their eye meet .

There have been plenty of spankings, but the scheduled maintenance spankings had been routine… last 8 years. Oh, yes, it is because I need it.

He regularly give  me a checklist to fill in and I was doomed if I did and doomed if I didn’t as far as the answers. To make things worse, the lovely, yet awful ginger plug was securely in place and he was enjoying the view of his bare-bottomed wife squirming in her chair filling in the checklist.

Rate each item on a scale of 1-10:

Bathroom cleaned: 8

Closet door closed: 6

Bedroom/Bath counters clear: 6

Kitchen counters clear: 7

Dishes maintained: 7

Floors Swept: 8

Laundry maintained: 7

Lights turned off: 5

Bed Made: 10

Bedroom picked up: 7

Downstairs picked up: 6

Preparation for maintenance (plug, notification): 10

Cupboards/fridge organization maintained: 8

Respect: 5

Other infractions: 9

Grading Scale:

Hand – 120-115

Belt – 115-110

Wooden Lighter Paddle – 110-105

Wooden School Paddle – 105-100

Bath Brush -100-95

Lexan 95-90

Tawse 90-85

(All subject to change per Thomas)

“ Bitch Jaime, are you finished?” Thomas’ deep voice carried into the kitchen from the den jolting my mind off the ginger plug and back to the discipline session of the moment.

“Yes Sir.”

“Well, bring it up to Living room where our daughter doing her home task and we will review it.”

I delicately took the paper Excel spread sheet and led my husband up the steps and into the living room , making sure to keep my cheeks tightly clenched to hold in the plug as I descending  the stairs. Standing in front of his large sofa, I handed the checklist to him, eyes focused on his perfectly blotless blotter. (I hate that he is so neat!) She admit but smile.

“Well, Jaime, I agree that these maintenance spankings are pretty routine. I hope you are aware that your answers had better not be much different than mine; you know the consequences.”

“Yes Sir.” I swallowed hard, praying that he would not be too strict. My bare bottom was fully exposed and I was scared. My husband is a wonderful man, but a severe, no nonsense spanker. The burn of the plug was beginning to wear off, but it was still very uncomfortable and the anticipation of the spanking to come was eating me inside.

“To the corner young lady and I will input your answers.” Enough to hear by my daughter Stafany but I have to kneel down face to wall and hold the ears while my nose will touch the wall.

I stood with my nose deep in the corner as we reviewed the list together. (Well, he did all the talking, I dared not argue.) My 7 on keeping the counters clear changed to a 4 and my 6 for keeping the downstairs picked up also was changed to a 4. He laughed at the 10 on making the bed… stating that he would go with it only because he had been off that week and was out of bed after me every day, making it his responsibility for making the bed. My 8 for keeping the refrigerator organized changed to a 4 as well. Finally, the “other infractions” I gave myself went from a 9 all the way down to a 5 as he reminded me of various bouts of attitude, slovenliness, and laziness.

“Jaime, I kept the fridge organized and the pantry. You did a great job cooking for everyone, but you never put anything back in the same place it came from. You either left it on the counter of put it on a completely different shelf. That discrepancy will cost you.”

I swallowed hard from the corner. I could not believe he was being so strict. I heard him clicking on the computer as he entered the numbers on the spread sheet. Why do men love Excel and the little formulas so much?

“Jaime, your total is 96. Do you know what that gets you?”

“Yes Sir.” My heart sunk as I realized from memory that I was about to receive a thorough dose of the bath brush… and that was a minimum, as everything was to his discretion. I had gone from thinking I was getting the light wooden paddle to the heavy solid bath brush.

“Do you have anything to say for yourself?”

I desperately wanted to tell him that it was not fair to be so rigid on the first week back of doing this. I had not known until that day that we were starting this back up, so the numbers would be low. Instead, I kept my thoughts to myself and simply answered, “No Sir, sorry Sir.”

“You will be. Your answers will cost you in severity. Look at me.”

I turned to look at him. I knew from his demeanor that he was not going to go lightly on me. I loved that fact, but it terrified me as well.

“The plug stays in. Go get the brush and wait for me in the corner.”

I turned and left the room and walked down the short hall into the bedroom. I placed the dreaded bath brush on the dresser. I was completely nude and  bare-bottomed and waited in the corner.

I heard him enter and pull the chair away from next to the dresser. He always call our daughter when dish me dose to witness how a women react when it is her time of correction.

“Over.”

I carefully lowered myself over his lap. I grabbed the wooden rails of the chair and focused on the tan rug. He adjusted me, secured me in place with his arm and patted my bottom.

Always in that point our eye meet and I smile to our daughter

“Hold your position young lady.”

He began to spank my upturned bottom with his large hand. Slow at first, then increasing with speed and intensity. He spanked me thoroughly moving from cheek to cheek, down to my lower thighs, to the top of my cheeks and back across both cheeks at once with one hand. He stopped occasionally to rub and admonish me and poke at the plug, but he would then start right back up again. I remained quiet, holding back the tears, focusing on the plug and the deep warm pain pulsating through my entire body from both the spanking and the plug.

He stopped spanking and I felt him release me.

“Go take the plug out  of your mom’’ will be his order to the sweet daughter.

I knew I had plenty of spanking still to come. I caught a quick glance of my already strawberry red bottom and thighs in the mirror and hurried back over my husband’s lap.

My mind scrambled…. I almost stuttered, but then I remembered the routine…“Will you please paddle me Sir?” I asked, genuinely sorry now and truly scared of what was to come.

“And what implement do you deserve to be severely paddled with Jaime?”

I paused, sighed deeply and then responded in my most respectful voice, “The bath brush Sir.” My heart pounded in my throat.

Without warning he hit me very hard one time on each cheek in rapid succession. The pain from the strikes took a second to register, and then the sting seared into my backside. I clenched and then relaxed, kicking my legs up and raising my head by straightening my elbows. I knew instantly that those movements just guaranteed that he was about to thoroughly light up my backside.

“Jaime.”

Two more HARD whacks met each cheek. I held still this time. Then the rapid fire started. He worked in the same manner as he had with the hand, thoroughly punishing every inch of my bottom and upper thighs. I began to cry and wiggle. He held me tightly and intensified the spanking… fast then slow, hard then soft. I was on fire everywhere. He spread my cheeks and lit up every inch of the tender spots between the cheeks. I started to wriggle and cry. Panic started to set in, but he spanked me through it until I submitted and hung loose over his lap, crying hard. He continued to spank until he knew he had worn me out. I cried heavily as he spanked every bit of resistance out of me.

“Very good baby.” He rubbed my blazing bottom as he spoke. “You are very very well disciplined. You took that very well”

I sobbed as he continued to rub. “Are we finished young lady or do you need more.”

“No Sir.” I replied.

“No Sir we are not finished or No Sir I need more?” (Thomas knows me too well.)

“No Sir, I need more.” I whimpered. (Why I do that to myself I never know… I do not want to say it, but it always comes out.)

The whole class is salient in agreement with Jaime because in most case we women do not want to stop our spanking too early till we orgasm from pain.

‘’He rubbed my bottom. Everything burned and I could feel that my cheeks had already turned hard from the severe spanking. “Your bottom can’t take much more Jaime. You will receive four more hard smacks and then you will be finished. You are to count them.”’’

My crying had slowed to a solid whimper and I braced myself for the strikes. He delivered four solid smacks two to my upper thighs and two to my bottom. I counted all four. When it was over he just rubbed me. I finally sensed that I was allowed to sit up; I kissed his neck and cuddled into his lap.

“You needed that, didn’t you?”

“Yes Sir.” He held me for a few more minutes and then patted my raw bottom as he lifted me off his lap.

“Clean up and we’ll watch a Netflix. Two came today in the mail.”

“What?” I responded back between sniffles. “No sex?”

“No, you know the rules, not after a maintenance spanking under 80%.”

I cleaned up and met him upstairs to watch “The Contract” or something like that. Needless to say, we had no sex last night, but this morning was a nice morning sex and as a result I wet the bed. I have a feeling these Maintenance Spankings  long to go.

So we all can understand that in case of Jaime  "maintenance" spankings -- meaning, spankings that aren't motivated by any particular misbehaviour but are intended rather as a general attitude adjustment or stress reliever.

At any rate, the reason that we generally receive maintenance spankings is most likely that we're safer than disciplinary ones because they don't require a judgement about fault or blame and can be given "just because."

Our habit, therefore, has become to ignore anything that would require an actual, specific disciplinary response and focus on periodic, general-purpose maintenance spankings instead.

This is, of course, a problem in a DD relationship, as there's a reason that it's called "Domestic Discipline" and not "Domestic 'Just Because'".

The disciplinary "bad girl" component of a spanking, for we girls, are crucial to the overall experience. We  feel the knot in our stomach (and nervous tingling elsewhere) that tells us that’ I've done wrong and now I need to pay. I need to feel the embarrassment and humility of knowing that I've "got it coming" for a specific mistake I've made’, that what's to come is not a favor or a way of helping us to relieve stress (not directly anyway), but a fair consequence for an error that we  made may be purposefully and knowingly the consequences.

And we all girls  need the security of knowing that when things go wrong in the relationship, there are specific, concrete consequences rather than the vague, silent tension that exists when there is no specific discipline given. And in the moment, we all need our disciplinarian to be stern, distant and without visible compassion, not loving and supportive (that comes after).

Feeling guilty, then punished or disciplined, and then subsequently cleansed and forgiven, is so much a part of the cathartic, transformative experience of DD for ans submissive girls  that without it, it's pretty much just theater. Perhaps minimally satisfying in the moment for its sexual subtext, but without any lasting psychological or relationship benefits.

This cycle of guilt/discipline/forgiveness is one of the many elements that separates DD from more deliberately erotic and sexual forms of pleasure/pain play, and puts it closer to the cathartic ritual pain practiced by many religious movements throughout the as well as traditional parent/child punishments.

As human beings, most of us have consciences -- and a desire to cleanse them periodically. Fortunately, our culture has precious few outlets for clearing one's conscience. The Masters give us has the Rite of Confession, we maintain a journal as a logging of our misdoing. For most of us, unless we receive a speeding ticket, a library fine or a reprimand or other disciplinary action at work, there are very few healthy mechanisms in contemporary culture for expunging adult guilt for a transgression .

Much of the power of DD -- whether we realize it consciously or not -- comes in its ability to formalize and provide a safe, contained way of cleansing our consciences for wrongs that we've done to ourselves and those around us. To remove the element of guilt/punishment/forgiveness from the DD experience by giving too many spankings "just because" risks removing the basic psychological element that makes DD "work."

That's not to say, of course, that there isn't a place for role playing, erotic spanking and other non-disciplinary activities -- of course there is and those things can be a lot of fun, but at their core, they generally (though not always) lack the psychological element of conscience-cleansing that's inherent to DD.

The difference between DD and these more sexually-oriented activities is that DD speaks directly to the very real, very human need to pay for one's crimes. And I suspect the growing appeal of DD has much to do with the lack of socially-acceptable ways for adults to pay for our transgressions, in a culture where anything goes and too many people seem to believe they have the "right" to treat anyone any way they please without consequences. (If you want to experience this lack of personal responsibility directly, just try asking someone to put their dog on a leash or not park their SUV in a compact spot and see the reaction you get.)

Deep down, the wiser, better part of us knows we don't have the "right" to behave badly just because we're adults, whether we push that knowledge away, cover it up with aggression and bravado, or acknowledge it. Those of us who recognize our need for DD are fortunate to be at least a little bit more in touch with our social and personal consciences than many of those around us -- which gives us a better-than-average shot at being better, more decent human beings than we would otherwise be.

Adult disciplinary spanking is not childhood spanking. It involves real, sincere, severe spankings because they fulfil you, they fulfil your partner, and they fulfil your relationship.

Discipline is a discipleship. While Discipleship may involve punishment. Sometimes facing and admitting one's inner self is just as freeing as the release you've found through DD. The time you spend spinning to reach those realizations can be upsetting and confusing. The maintenance discipline give an opportunity to experience the guilt/atonement/forgiveness cycle.

At the end it may be rewarding, powerful, sexual, fun, and spiritual, etc.